Rita Rudner Quotes

Whenever I date a guy, I think, 'Is this the man I want my children to spend their weekends with?' - Rita Rudner

When you're a dancer, you start with the basics. You don't all of a sudden do a grand jete and pirouette. You start with first position, second, third. - Rita Rudner

When I eventually met Mr Right I had no idea that his first name was Always. - Rita Rudner

We've begun to long for the pitter-patter of little feet - so we bought a dog. Well, it's cheaper, and you get more feet. - Rita Rudner

They usually have two tellers in my local bank, except when it's very busy, when they have one. - Rita Rudner

There are different kinds of humor, some is sarcastic, some introspective. Introspective fit my personality better. - Rita Rudner

The word 'aerobics' came about when the gym instructors got together and said: If we're going to charge $10 an hour, we can't call it Jumping up and down. - Rita Rudner

The time you spend grieving over a man should never exceed the amount of time you actually spent with him. - Rita Rudner

The older theory was, marry an older man because they're more mature. But the new theory is men don't mature. Marry a younger one. - Rita Rudner

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