Tim Vine Quotes

You see my next door neighbour worships exhaust pipes, he's a catholic converter.

- Tim Vine

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Door | Neighbour | Worships | Exhaust | Pipes |

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With silly stuff, it's seventy-five percent confidence. I always tell people that it's because I'm nervous about getting that next laugh and I need to hear it. I always want to condense a joke. - Tim Vine

I'm not someone who gets to play The O2 and places like that, but that's the kind of rock and roll venue. The popularity of stand-up means that some people are getting to play rock star venues. - Tim Vine

You know, somebody actually complimented me on my driving today. They left a little note on the windscreen, it said 'Parking Fine.' So that was nice. - Tim Vine