Funny Christmas Card Quotes

What do you call people who are afraid of Santa Claus? Claustrophobic. - Unknown

The one thing women don't want to find in their stockings on Christmas morning is their husband. - Joan Rivers

The awkward moment when Santa accidentally leaves the price tag on your present. - Eddy Sims

Santa saw your Facebook status's... he's getting you a dictionary for Christmas. - Unknown

Santa is very jolly because he knows where all the bad girls live. - Dennis Miller

Santa Claus wears a Red Suit, He must be a communist. And a beard and long hair, Must be a pacifist. What's in that pipe that he's smoking? - Arlo Guthrie

Perhaps the best Yuletide decoration is being wreathed in smiles. - Anon

Never worry about the size of your Christmas tree. In the eyes of children, they are all 30 feet tall. - Larry Wilde