Fred Allen Quotes

You can take all the sincerity in Hollywood and place it in the navel of a fruit fly, and still have room left for three caraway seeds and an agent's heart. - Fred Allen

Where were you fellows when the paper was blank? - Fred Allen

When a radio comedian's program is finally finished it slinks down Memory Lane into the limbo of yesteryear's happy hours. All that the comedian has to show for his years of work and aggravation is the echo of forgotten laughter. - Fred Allen

What's on your mind, if you will allow the overstatement? - Fred Allen

We are living in the machine age. For the first time in history the comedian has been compelled to supply himself with jokes and comedy material to compete with the machine. Whether he knows it or not, the comedian is on a treadmill to oblivion. - Fred Allen

Treat employees like partners, and they act like partners. - Fred Allen

There's good cops, but there's more bad cops than good cops around here. - Fred Allen

The vice-president of an advertising agency is a bit of executive fungus that forms on a desk that has been exposed to conference. - Fred Allen

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