Henny Youngman Quotes

You look like a talent scout for a cemetery. - Henny Youngman

You have a ready wit. Tell me when it's ready. - Henny Youngman

You have a nice personality, but not for a human being. - Henny Youngman

You can't buy love, but you can pay heavily for it. - Henny Youngman

Why don't Jews drink? It interferes with their suffering. - Henny Youngman

Why do Jewish men die before their wives? They want to. - Henny Youngman

Why do Jewish divorces cost so much? They're worth it. - Henny Youngman

When I told my doctor I couldn't afford an operation, he offered to touch-up my X-rays. - Henny Youngman

When I read about the evils of drinking, I gave up reading. - Henny Youngman

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